Girls burn their boats when they date... sort of.... (Dating and Viral Marketing)

When Cortez came to the America’s to conquer the Aztec Indians he knew that many had tried and failed.  He knew that his men would have to be extremely motivated to defeat the Aztecs.  So when they had unloaded their ships, he ordered them burnt; leaving no means for a retreat.  They had to either conquer or die.  No I am not suggesting in any sense that when women get in a relationship that they are stuck there and there is no going back.  But it is much more of a process for a woman to get back into the dating scene after a breakup than it is for a man. 

After a breakup, a man simply asks another girl out.  But in our culture, where girls typically don’t do the asking, they resort to spreading the word that they are single again through networks of friends and family.  This viral marketing can take awhile for quality guys to get the word.  Then once they are aware, many men feel like they have to “run into them” somehow before they can call; a cold call would feel to desperate.   So in addition to the word spreading the girl typically has to get out and mingle in the social scene.  

This has two side effects.  First is that girls are often (not always) a little more cautious when jumping into a relationship when there are several suitors because once she quits singlehood its tougher to get back into the swing of things.  Additionally, girls tend to put more of their heart and soul into making a relationship work once they have committed.  Maybe this is why some women stay in abusive relationships; starting over can be very difficult.  Men should understand that if they are taking out a girl that has several suitors that she may be interested but wants to take things a little slower at first because she doesn’t want to dig herself out of “in-a-relationship status” just yet.  She may legitimately be interested and may actually be more interested in you than she lets on.  Just be patient for a couple of weeks and see if you are the cream that rises to the top.

These two social protocols may be on their way out however with the advent of online social networks.  News, especially news of a personal nature, can spread instantly with a single “wall post” or “status update.”   It will be interesting to see if this shortens the trip back to singlehood for women.  I have a feeling that social networking will change the dating/marketing game forever.  It has changed the way we do business and how we market goods and services…. It will change dating relationships as well.

This is my first blog about dating and viral marketing.... Love to hear your thoughts and comments.  Do you agree? disagree? What insight can you share?  Please leave your thoughts if you have any.

eye socket messaging

I was part of an honor society in College whose entire focus was to help its members develop harvard-look-a-like resumes and develop interviewing skills so that they could "sell themselves" to potential employers.  We studied strategy on how to steer interviews in our favor, how to highlight our strengths on resume's, and how to negotiate a mutually satisfactory employment agreement. We practiced over and over the message that we wanted our potential employer to recieve.  Some of the least qualified people got the best jobs because they packaged the presentation properly. 

Preparation separates the fluff from the real stuff.  Less qualified applicants often beat out more qualified ones by communicating a less impressive message more impressively!  When video tapes came to market, VHS and BETA were competing to be the industry standard.  BETA was the better product but VHS communicated a lesser message more impressively and won out.

McDonalds certainly doesn't have the best hamburgers in the world.  But they have communicated their message more impressively.  This principle is found everywhere.  Often engineers and accountants have much more important and useful information than a salesperson but the salesperson often presents a lesser message more effectively.

The world's greatest news, if packaged poorly, will fall on deaf ears.  So communicating a message is critical. So critical that sometimes simplicity and storytelling are the most effective presentations.  Why did Jesus teach in parables... Because shepherd related to sheep stories! When sending a message, why not send a message that will be easily processed and remembered.  A picture is worth a thousand power point slides of text!

Many years ago, Mark Twain delivered a memorized speech around the country.  He had a number of key points to make and relied on notes to keep on point.  He once lost his notes and delivered a terrible speech; after which he decided that he needed to have a better method of delivering his points. He took a bottle of ink and etched the first letter of each key point on his fingernails.  After he delivered that message he would rub off the ink and move to the next point.

This was a distraction to himself and the audience, who thought it odd that he kept fidgeting with his fingernails.  One Mark Twain decided to draw six pictures of his speech, which he did in two minutes.  He immediatly tossed the pictures away and never used notes to deliver his speech again.  He claims he could rewrite the speech 25 years later because he still retained the images in his mind!

The lesser message, communicated more effectivly, makes the greater impact.